by Olivia
Ok, fine! You caught me! I did indeed apologize to a chair after bumping into it. What’s so wrong with that? It’s not like I’m eating a sandwich without the crust or naming every single one of my houseplants “Jared”. Not to mention sorting my socks by how judgemental they look, clapping at the end of a movie I watched alone at home, or never using an umbrella even though I own two. What about dancing in my room alone? Or get this! Trying to teach my goldfish tricks growing up. Who would ever house rolly pollies for them to die only two days later. No one’s ever heard of giving a phone fake CPR when it dies. Reorganizing stuffed animals daily at the age of one in a crib. Imagining a closet is a portal to Narnia. Making sure a blanket is perfectly set. Playing hide and seek after a bath with siblings growing up. Pronouncing breakfast and yellow wrong. Who would do that though? Me. I did.