by Olivia
Everyone has three faces, but no one warns you which one will affect you the most. First there is the face that you present to the world, the one that aligns with social norms and polished phrases. The mask we wear to hide insecurity and appear okay even when we’re not. Then there's the ones you show to your friends and family—it allows you to express emotion and let go of thoughts. It’s still filtered in a way so you don’t get hurt though. Finally there is the third face—one that can eat people alive. The one that no one shows. Where we hide fears we never acknowledge and dreams we never speak of. It stays hidden and can only be seen by one's innermost self. Some people feel like it’s there just to remind themselves that no one will ever actually know you fully. That any lover or friend can’t picture you the same way that you see your own soul. I get scared that no one will ever find my third face. But thankfully the other day mine smiled through every other word I spoke until the silence underneath it started to shout. It never translated fully in that moment but it made me realize that the idea that no one will see my true face was bullshit. That it was reaching through the tiny cracks that is my mask to latch on to other people. And those people who fall for who I am deep inside are the ones who value me the most. Sure, no one will know the side of me that I show when I’m truly alone, but I express tiny parts of that face in the two I put on the most for people regardless of my own feelings. No matter what, this partly concealed face is the one that makes the most difference. And is the one worth knowing the most.